Why an African American edition of 10 Great Dates?
While 10 Great Dates has been used successfully in African American communities, generally Black churches want and need their own curriculum, so we are thrilled that Drs. Rozario and Angela Slack joined with us to present the video date launches for 10 Great Dates for Black Couples. While the content is the same, African American couples will appreciate hearing and seeing it from Rozario and Angela and through their filter. Their own stories are great and they really relate well to any audience and especially to African American couples. 10 Great Dates for Black Couples helps to meet the needs of African American churches that are looking for easy-to-lead, inexpensive, skill-based curriculum. The participant’s book, 10 Great Dates to Energize Your Marriage, is the same for both editions of 10 Great Dates.
More about the 10 Great Dates Program
As we work with couples across the United States and internationally, we continually hear peoples say, “We want to work on our marriage, but we don’t have the time, money, energy, or child-care providers. Besides, we wouldn’t know what to do or where to go!” The 10 Great Dates concept responds to this plea.
Based on our work in marriage education for over 25 years, we’ve combined marriage skills with a fun dating format. This proven approach to relationship growth is low-key, purposeful, effective, easy, and fun. As the facilitator, basically all you have to do is welcome the couples, show them the date launch video segment, remind them to come back and pick up their children on time, and to have fun on their great date.
And the best part, 10 Great Dates is a male-friendly program that appeals to the masses! If you are the church on the corner offering fun dates and child-care, they will come. Consistently, groups report that by the second or third date, the guys are the ones who are making sure they don’t miss their date night. Couples who would never attend a marriage conference, seminar or small group, willingly participate in 10 Great Dates without realizing it’s a comprehensive marriage education program disguised as ten fun dates. It’s an ice-breaker to get them into other groups and growth opportunities.
And it’s a great program for community healthy marriage initiatives. It’s broad-based and appeals to all ages and stages of marriage. In Sioux Falls, South Dakota, over 1,000 couples have participated in 10 Great Dates. It’s a community-wide program offered by churches each January! In an attempt to address the rising divorce rate in Sacramento, California, 40 different congregations and community groups there recently launched the 10 Great Dates program. Over 500 couples participated in this initial offering and 10 Great Dates is now offered to the community on an ongoing basis.
And what about individual couples? What difference is this program making? While this program is designed as an educational program, from time to time we hear amazing stories like the following email we received from a couple:
“My husband and I had been separated for almost a year and I believed that divorce was our only option, but we decided to give it one more try. We agreed to sign up for 10 Great Dates at our counselor’s suggestion. I was willing to try anything. On our first date we agreed not to talk about our children or our marriage problems; instead to focus on the dating topic and on us.
On our date we went to a nice restaurant, ordered, and pulled out our dating exercise. When we started going down memory lane (the first exercise), something sparked! We had so much fun sharing our answers and remembering our life together 19 years ago. I was amazed at how much Mike remembered about us dating, and about our wedding day. Talking about the day we met about made us cry.
I had agreed to go with Mike on a business trip the following week. I was very apprehensive about going, but after our first date, I couldn’t wait. We both felt like a young couple going off together for the first time. The week was more than we could ever dreamed it could be. It was way better than our honeymoon. One evening we were walking down the street hand-in-hand and I looked at Mike and realized I still loved him very much. And the best part was that this man already knew me and all my faults and he was the father of my children!
I shared my thoughts with him, and that was such a turning point for us and our communication skills. We are learning to trust and share. This was in May and at the end of July, my girls and I moved home. It was like we were never gone. I have to say, 10 Great Dates did more for our marriage than counseling ever did and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Thanks for sharing our story.”
While you may not see such dramatic results leading 10 Great Dates, don’t be surprised if you do! We are glad you are taking the time to encourage other couples to energize their marriage through dating their mate. And, one more thing—remember as you lead the program, to have fun on your own great date!